This post marks my 400 posts on this blog! Well, I've been blogging for 2 years now. And I witnessed, everything changed.
Usually I’m ambivalent toward girls. First they like me, then they’re angry, when they observe the big NO in my eyes, or on my face, or in my words, whatever okay.
I was in love twice in my life.
The first was 8 years ago. The girl was my classmate, was beautiful, kind and exciting. I lost my breath when she entered the room. She was my only thought, my notes were full of her. She liked me a much too but as a friend. But I remained passive. As a good nihilist, I didn't wanted to build a relationship or anything. I was in fire and was cool at the same time. I could not let my emotions win even a little battle over my... ego. My stubborness is invincible. I felt it was almost too much for my weak heart. I was happy, and didn't wanted to be more happy, and I think I couldn't have been more happy. Years after, it happened not once, that I unexpectedly dreamed with that girl, and at the morning woke up in love, so she has a strong influence on me, I suppose.
Note: Maybe a psychologist, or somebody would have a few words about me based on this, but it’s not my profession, do what they want.
The second happened last 2 years, it was love at first sight. I felt the girl hacked my glass heart with a pick. I lost myself for days, emotions drove me. Only anger have been so strong in me before this. Unfortunately, the girl got frightened of me, and run away. I don’t blame her, it was natural reaction. The whole story took only for a week. But at least it deleted the remnants of the other love. My heart still in ruins, but who cares? Stupid love. It’s not easy to live as a human.
Oh ya, you guys should watch Julianne's proactiv behind the scenes commercial, she's so adorable, and cute.. Erm, cute and adorable! I liked her smiles and her laughs! Arghh!
